So why is it that at the most random times people come out of the woodwork? People that you were dormant like winter grass and now are blossoming in the warmth of spring?

Maybe that's just it. Maybe the warmer temps and the availability to more sunlight is what causes this phenomenon. Apparently, I've been on a few people's minds lately and not just Ben's. That in itself is hard for me to wrap my brain around because I'm so accustomed to feeling like there are few people in this world who could care less about me.... I mean this in the sense of they can "take it or leave it" so-to-speak.

On the other hand, I wonder if some of the "attention" that has come my way is because those individuals themselves are just bored and know that I'm available. In essence, that I am just a body that happens to be present.

It's always been difficult for me to truly know what someone's intentions are towards me.... do they GENUINELY care about me as a person and my well-being or are there underlying alterior motives? I find it quite the challenge to stop and think that someone might actually care about me for me. It's been a constant issue/battle for me.

I mean, I do make friends kinda easily at times... whether or not they stick around is entirely different. I think that for the most part, I'm a good & decent person but is it enough? Is it worthy of someone else to have feelings of care or concern towards me?

How do I know when someone genuinely and truly 100% "loves" me. (I don't necessarily mean the romantic kind of love.) I dunno... maybe with certain people I only hear it so randomly and infrequently that when I *do* actually hear how someone feels about me, I'm more apt to just kinda sweep it under the carpet to an extent.

Maybe I'll solve this puzzle in due time. Meanwhile, these are some of the thoughts that race around my head.

Until next time...peace, love & HEALTH!!!